What Makes Men ‘Gay’?

Posted in Family, Work by Benham Brothers | November 12th, 2014

“Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces.” Psalm 34:5
The headline of a recent Huffington Post article caught my attention – it was titled, “What Makes Men ‘Gay’?” Needless to say, I was a bit surprised to see my face under the headline 🙂

Although it threw me off a bit, I truly enjoyed reading the article. Not only did it make me smile, but it brought much more clarity in my mind to the issues at hand and further solidified my belief that our approach to the LGBT community is the right one. Be loving and tell the truth. You can read the article here, but be sure to come back and read the rest of this blog 🙂

I remember the writer, Michelangelo, at the Values Voter Summit. He’s a sharp guy with a great smile, and we had no idea he was gay. But that wouldn’t have changed a thing – we still would’ve treated him with kindness, love, and respect. Why? Because the joy of the Lord fills our hearts. And because, like all of us, he is truly a man who needs God’s love.

Michelangelo, as well as every other human being in the world, is in daily need of God’s love. So as representatives of Christ, we are to show them God’s love as well, which includes warnings against behaviors that aren’t God’s best for them. This is true love.

When my brother and I “looked to the Lord” (repented of our sins and confessed Jesus as Lord) as young kids in Dallas, TX, a supernatural joy filled our hearts. We had returned to the One who created us and we dedicated every area of our lives to honor Him. This doesn’t mean we get it all right by any means, but it does mean that there is no shame in walking in repentance, which produces incredible joy from within!

Although Michelangelo’s first paragraph was based on a smearing false narrative by the ‘agenda media,’ what I find most interesting is how he genuinely believes that true joy and love for others are gay attributes. Unfortunately, Michelangelo’s perception of these attributes simply fits the agenda’s takeover blueprint.

First it was the rainbow, then the arts, then style – and the list goes on. Now it’s genuine love for others and joy. I guess being a good parent is next on the list, or running a successful business? Recognizing the beauty of rainbows, participating in the arts, having a sense of style, being filled with joy, and loving others are not gay attributes, they are God attributes.

When those in the gay community meet Christians that have been changed from the inside out by Jesus and are filled with the radiance of His joy it confuses them. Unfortunately, many of them believe the agenda’s narrative that’s been created against Biblical Christians. “Wait a second, these guys are actually interested in me as a person, they stay in shape, they’re really happy, they compliment me and put their arm around me in a picture – they must be gay!” I know, sounds crazy.

I understand that some Christians have not displayed Christ’s love toward the gay community, while others have not shared Christ’s truth with them either. This is a tough battle within the church. We’ll get it right soon. But all around the country I’m beginning to see Christians filled with Christ’s love and truth that are confusing gay men, like Michelangelo, and causing them to ask questions about their lifestyle. Those in the gay community see joy and love, and it attracts them.

A few weeks ago my brother had a gay couple over for dinner, and these men fell in love with his family. They fully knew Jason’s Biblical views about the danger of their lifestyle, yet they also knew of Jason’s genuine love for them. Jason represented both truth and love to these men, which is Christ’s recipe for transformation. It was a wonderful night for them all.

Here’s a great picture of Biblical love and truth – “Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous, love does not brag, and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-6

If love “rejoices with the truth” then it’s not true love to “leave out the truth” when connecting with the gay community. It’s also not true love to leave out any other attribute of love as well! Truth and love will break the chains of darkness and bring a joy that’s contagious to everyone that “looks to the Lord.” And it will cause the gay community to ask questions like “what makes men gay?”

I was recently in Florida on a business trip and had an excellent conversation with a gay man. He opened up to me about how his dad had abandoned him and how much he desperately looked for love in another man. I simply opened the scriptures to Him and showed him how Jesus is a father to the fatherless, and how his gay lifestyle only masked the root issues in his life. Within twenty minutes of him hearing this truth tears filled his eyes as he bowed his head and surrendered his life to Jesus. And yes, my arm was around him when he prayed!

Now this young man knows true joy because truth and love collided with him that day. He no longer has to be defined by the sin nature, which is what makes men “gay,” rather, he can be defined by true joy in Jesus by walking in repentance. Now his sense of style, his commitment to health, and his radiant personality are glorifying the One that gave it all to him from the beginning!

Image courtesy of Rosemary Ratcliff at FreeDigitalPhotos.net